Happy Birthday, John Harrison!

So, today is JHP's birthday. We spent the day with Grandma and Grandpa. Tonight after dinner, we sang Happy Birthday again, including Great Aunt Susan's voicemail she left earlier in the day where she sang to John. And we put the cake with the candle in front of him, again. And again, he was less than impressed. Here he is picking at the frosting before I blew out the candle for him. Afterwards I cut him a piece of cake and he was even less impressed. In fact, he was more interested in the plate it rested on, turning the cake onto the tray to play with the plate which he then dumped on the floor. The cake was chocolate/chocolate. So, I cut him a piece of white cake that we had left from the large one I bought for the party. No dice. John tried to feed JHP some and it was not popular, resulting in lots of protest and the need to insert the pacifier, which was a regular fixture today for some reason. I'm not sure if this is the Momma's boy phase or if he's teething. I just wish it would pass...I'm really getting tired of the need of me!

Earlier in the day, we'd gone to Kemah to eat some seafood and JHP made a liar out of me. I had told Bev that usually, John is really good when we go out to eat. Well, today, he started to protest about half way through his meal - this was definitely unusual. I'm thinking he was just tired because he fell asleep on the way home and had a good long nap. We had to get the paci out, but later when offered a lemon, he perked up. We weren't sure how he'd react to the tart, but he really liked it and the attention it brought as you can see from the following two pictures.

And here is everyone at the table. Notice my smiling son is holding up his lemon. He's so proud of it!

Tomorrow, it's back to work for John, back to a routine for me, and back to MDO for JHP. And Tom & Bev travel home. Hopefully, we all survive the day without too much angst.

In some respects I can't believe it's been a year since John was born. In other ways, it seems like forever (especially when the weeks seems to drag on and blur into one another). I can honestly say I don't think I knew what I was getting into. Motherhood wasn't something that I grew up thinking about, dreaming about the day I'd become a mother. It was only in the last couple of years, when I felt my clock ticking, that I felt like this was something I wanted to do. And then we had setbacks, which I firmly believe were meant to remind me that it wasn't time yet. Things weren't in order. I was still working and John wasn't convinced that he wanted kids (Scared would be one way to describe it, I think. Now, whether he'd admit that or not, I'm not sure..) By the time I conceived JHP, we were both ready.

But, we weren't ready for the new baby and the first 6 months (and we weren't ready for the birth either...no bags packed). Oh, those were tough months. We struggled with lots and lots of crying before I gave up drinking milk, which did improve things some. Looking back, I think JHP just wasn't getting enough to eat. Breastfeeding wasn't a problem and early on I made enough milk, but then I think my supply dropped off and we really should have supplemented more. I think it would have saved us a lot of headaches. It took him until he was 6 months old to make it to the 50 percentile in weight. I remember the pediatrician at one of more recent visits saying, "And to think I was once worried about him gaining weight!" And now, he's breaking my back some days!

He really is a good baby. I should really say toddler because he's going everywhere these days. (He practiced lots last week and showed it all off this weekend for the family.) But I'm beginning to miss those days where he is content to sit and snuggle with me. As much as I complain about the neediness, I do cherish those times when it's quiet and I'm rocking him and all he wants is for me to hold him. I used to really cherish the middle of the night feedings (once I could stay awake through them!) because it allowed me the quiet time to really enjoy John Harrison. I though of that last night when he woke about 2am and I rocked him a bit before putting him back in his crib. I can't remember how many times early on that he slept in my arms because that was the only place he would, especially late in the day or at night. Or when he and I would nap together, all snuggled up on the couch or chair or even in the bed. Sometimes it was hard and sometimes I didn't appreciate the time enough. Because it has gone so fast. WOW - one year old! I love you, John Harrison Pitcher, Momma's baby boy!

Sorry, I rambled a bit and got all sentimental on you!

-EBP-